Self-Abandonment And Self-Validation

The media has a way of deluding us into believing certain things which aren't true. Because of romance novels and movies, many people have come to believe that having someone by their side is the key to happiness in life. They feel as though they are incomplete without a boyfriend/girlfriend, and they spend their whole lives searching for that one person, that one piece of the puzzle that is their heart in order to feel happy, but usually end up in unsatisfying relationships with narcissists or Love Avoidant individuals. The idea of destiny, and having a soulmate out there is, without a doubt, a beautiful fantasy. Unfortunately, reality doesn't work like that, and the fact of the matter is that, in order to have satisfying relationships, you need to have a satisfying relationship with yourself first, because our relationships are our mirrors.
So how can we escape the seemingly endless cycle of seeking love outside of ourselves? The answer to that is to start validating yourself, and the best way to do that is to take a moment to self-reflect every day, at the very least ten to fifteen minutes.
During those ten to fifteen minutes sit down, with no distractions whatsoever, and ask yourself:

1. What is it about my hobbies that gives me fulfillment, and why am I proud of myself for spending time on them?

2. What is it about my personality traits that make me proud of myself? If you are a determined person who never gives up, what is it about that aspect of your personality that you like?

3. What is it about my achievements that I am proud of?

Many people aren't fortunate to have grown up with parents who validated their worth, rather, they were made to feel invisible, and as a result, when they grow up, they go on a search for that one person who could give them the unconditional love they felt they never got. Sadly, they usually end up with people who abandon them the way their parents abandoned them, and the way they abandon themselves. Luckily, as someone who has been through similar experiences and overcame them, I can promise you that, as long as you are determined to heal your wounds, it's never too late to become who you were meant to be.

Alexis